It finally happened.
Date: July 7, 2010
Time: 10:13 am
Place: Walmart
Department: Shoes
What: After shoving Evan's hand away from pushing open the lid on the store's filthy public garbage bin, the words I have dreaded hearing since child birth entered my ears -
"I hate you"
I thought that I would be devastated when this day finally came. I thought tears would immediately fill my eyes and his punishment would be to see how heartbroken he had made me. And so despite my shock by the words escaping his lips, I was even more surprised by my reaction.
I stopped pushing my shopping cart and squatted down on my knees. With arms outstretched I asked him to please come here. I tried to relate to him how much I loved him. How "hate" is not a nice word and should not be used. That it is the opposite of love. And if you love someone, you should never say that you hate them. You may not have liked what I did, but that does not mean you hate me.
I'm sure there are many more of these days to come. But hopefully he understood at least an ounce of the message. And hopefully I can continue to show him how much he is loved so that when those feelings of anger, and perhaps slivers of hatred, enter his thoughts again, he will know where to place them.
I imagine heart breaks, in some variety, are inevitable as a mother. But I'll wait until they are truly warranted.
4 comments:
Oh wow!! You handled that so wonderfully! Way to go!! I'm sure he got the message clearer than if you tapped his mouth or started crying.
That is a good reaction. I usually just laugh.
your such a good mom. and i love your blog :)
just catchin up on blogs the last few days. yours is really inspiring tash. thanks for sharing.
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